Forbidden Visions
by Serena530
Summary: A Blue Bloods fiction. Takes place after Masquerade. How is Schuyler's life in the Force household? What exactly is going on between her and Jack? Is her friendship with Oliver holding up? All this and more. ON HIATUS-Check profile for updates
1. A New Dwelling

**Disclaimer****: I do not own Blue Bloods or the characters, and have no right to it except as a fan. I leave all the creative yummy stuff we love so much to Melissa De La Cruz.**

**Author's Note****: The beginning of this story isn't turning out how I originally wanted, but I can't remember exactly how I worded everything since it's been so long since I thought about this story. At the time I hadn't written any of it down, because I didn't think I would ever post it. But that's okay. It may turn out better then I originally thought. Anyway….this story will have both Schuyler's POV and Jack's POV. I'm still working out exactly how I plan to have that look, so his POV will come in short bursts for now.

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**Forbidden Visions**

_Chapter One: A New Dwelling_

On the flight home to New York Schuyler thought about everything that had happened, and everything that she had learned since arriving in Venice. She sat in a window seat next to her grandfather looking out at the sky. _This whole trip has been a complete nightmare. I'll make sure my first trip to Venice is my primary remembrance of the place._ She thought with a sigh as she closed her eyes and rested her head back on the headrest of the comfy first class seat.

She thought about how it all started with that Silver Blood Kinsley Martin. At least how the trip to Venice started for she knew that it went further back. _If he hadn't come along this would have never happened. I wouldn't have had to risk my life to save Mimi's life, her life wouldn't have been on the line if he hadn't tempted her with black spells, she wouldn't have been tempted if she hadn't been trying to get me out of her and Jack's life. Now look what's happened. She's stuck with me they're all stuck with me, because Charles Force decided he wanted to take an interest in my life just because my grandfather showed up._ She thought bitterly.

_Oh god! I'm going to have to live with Mimi and Jack. Why is life being so cruel to me?_ She thought sadly as she leaned forward and put her head in her hands. _As if I wasn't having enough trouble getting rid of my feelings for him; now I'm going to be living under the same roof as him. Ugh! I don't even want to think about having Mimi around all the time._ She thought with a pained sigh.

At that she felt a hand on her back. "It will be alright Schuyler." She heard her grandfather say softly. Lawrence Van Alen was also pained by this turn of events. Not as pained as Schuyler for he had no idea how deep her agony was, and from where it sprang from. "No it won't." She said just as softly as she sat up and looked at him with a sad face. She then leaned against him and let herself drift off to sleep so she didn't have to think anymore.

After they arrived in New York Lawrence woke Schuyler up and they exited the plane. Waiting for them outside the airport was Julius. "Home please Julius, but only for a while. We must take Schuyler to the Forces." Lawrence said after they got into the car and Schuyler groaned.

Once they arrived home Schuyler reluctantly went to her room where Beauty, her bloodhound greeted her warmly, and began to pack. She unplugged the many cords to her computer and stored it safely in her black trunk, along with half the clothes hanging in her closet. She had decided to leave half her clothes there. _This will always be my home, and I'll be able to visit my grandfather._ She thought as she began to pull clothes from her bureau and put them in one of her suitcases.

_He couldn't give me a couple of days could he?_ She thought as she continued to pack. Charles Force or 'uncle Charles' seemed to want her away from her grandfather quickly and she had no idea why.

Just then her grandfather came in the room. "Taking your time aren't you?" He asked. "Of course." She answered with a smile. They both knew that she could have been done seconds after she started, but she was in no rush to get to the Forces pent house mansion.

When she was done they carried all her luggage down to the car. Then she put Beauty's leash on and they got into the car and headed to her new home.

* * *

Schuyler sat in the center of the soft full size bed in her new room staring blankly as the wall across from her. Beauty lay across the bed in front of her, stretched out and relaxed as Schuyler pet her softly.

After Schuyler and her grandfather got to their destination they carried her belongings inside the building and to the elevator. The Forces mansion was like a house on top of a thirty-story building. When they arrived on the floor of the Forces mansion they were greeted and shown in by a maid, then another maid came and informed them that she was told to show Schuyler to her room. Apparently none of the Forces were there to greet her, but she was completely fine with that.

So they followed her up two flights of grand staircases and then down a spacious hallway with four doors. Schuyler's new room was the last door at the end of the hallway.

Once they were inside the room the only thing Schuyler registered was that it had two doors besides the one they had just walked through, a large window, a large bed with a nightstand on each side, a wood floor, a desk, a bureau, and porcelain white walls. It was clearly a guest room with all the fancy, but cheesy guest stuff removed. It was simple just as she liked it, but it was not her room. It was just a guest room and always would be.

After they had set her things down in front of the bed they noticed that the maid had disappeared. Schuyler didn't care; she took that opportunity to say goodbye to her grandfather without prying eyes. She wrapped her arms around his back and gave him a big hug.

She had no idea how long they stood there hugging each other; she just knew that she wasn't letting him go. And she didn't until she heard him heave a sigh that only a vampire, with their extra-sensitive hearing, could hear, and say that he should get going.

They said goodbye and she watched as he walked out of the room closing the door quietly behind him. She felt like crying as she took her shoes off and sat in the middle of the bed with her legs crossed, but she forced herself not to as she watched Beauty jump on the bed. She wouldn't show her tears; she wouldn't appear as weak in front of the Forces.

Therefore she decided to hold it all in and not think about it, which is why she was staring blankly at the wall. She hoped that the blank surface would help keep her mind clear of all thought since she wasn't ready to deal with everything yet.

As she sat there the light coming in through the window slowly faded until it disappeared throwing the room into darkness, but not so dark that she couldn't see. She knew that, that was due to her vampire blood.

After a time she heard a soft knock on the door, but she ignored it. She didn't even glance in that direction as she continued to pet Beauty and stare blankly at the wall. She heard the door open, but again she ignored it.

"Schuyler?" She heard a voice call softly, and it was impossible to mistake it. She had that voice memorized…against her will, but would know it anywhere. It was Jack Force. Never the less, she still didn't answer even thought it had become harder to keep her thoughts away.

Jack entered the room and closed the door behind him, cutting off the light source, and went to sit next to her. "Schuyler?" He said again and he got no answer, no movement, and no acknowledgement that he had even entered the room. He wasn't even hearing any thoughts coming from her. _What's going on with her?_ He thought in concern as he placed his hand on her shoulder and shook her lightly.

Schuyler sighed as she blinked and looked at him. Even in the dark she could make out his green eyes, and the physical contact seemed to make that ever-present attraction between them stronger. She looked away before she could get lost in his eyes, and allow either one of them to act on the feelings they both were trying to suppress.

"What's up? Are you okay?" He asked while he reluctantly removed his hand from her shoulder. "I'm fine. I was just sitting here trying to keep my mind blank." She said as she looked down at Beauty. "Can I ask why?" He asked. "I just wasn't ready…still not ready to deal with this situation, so I thought I would keep myself from thinking." She said.

"You haven't unpacked yet." He said and she could tell that it wasn't a question. "I wasn't ready yet. I'm just…I'm just not ready to do anything right now. I still need a little time." She said so quietly that his vampire hearing almost didn't pick it up. "Okay. I'll leave you alone so you can take the time you need." He said. "Thanks." She said as she watched him leave. "No problem." He said with a smile in his voice as he closed the door. _I knew this would be hard, but it's going to be even harder then I thought to live with him_. She thought as she looked around the room.

Jack leaned against the door as he listened to her thought. _Will it really be that hard?_ He wondered as he walked to his room. He could still feel the attraction between them, and he was so drawn to her that he felt like turning around and going right back to her room. _It __is__ going to be that hard_. He thought with a sigh as he entered his room.

Schuyler sat there for a while longer as she thought about whether or not she should try and get her empty minded focus back or just unpack. _If I unpack now I wouldn't have to worry about it later, and I wouldn't have to worry about anyone bugging me about why I hadn't done it yet._ She thought with a sigh as she got up and turned on the light. The light was so bright that she was nearly blinded.

She then went and closed the curtains without looking at the view and proceeded to unpack her trunk. She took her time setting up her computer. When she was done she turned it on and clicked around to make sure it was working properly, and when she was satisfied she turned it off and continued with her unpacking.

_What are these two doors?_ She thought as she headed toward the door in the wall in front of the bed. When she opened it she found that it was a closet. A large walk in closet with shelves lining the top. _Nice. Even if I had brought all my clothes I'd still have more than half this closet to fill_. She thought offhandedly as she hung up her clothes.

She unpacked slowly at first, but then she decided to use the Velox to get it all over with. _The sooner I get this done the sooner I can get back to doing nothing, and not thinking_. She thought and within seconds she had finished unpacking, had moved her trunk and suitcases into the very back of the closet, plugged up her charger and connected it to her cell phone and placed it on the nightstand on the left side of the bed, removed Beauty's leash, and turned the light off.

Before she lay back down she decided to see what the second door led to. It was in the wall where the head of the bed was pressed against, and directly across from the wall with the closet door. _It's probably another closet_. She thought as she opened it. Turns out it was a spacious bathroom complete with a separate shower, bathtub and it's own window. _Nice_. She thought as she closed the door and went to lie in the middle of the bed.

"Come here Beauty." She called to her bloodhound and felt her walk along side her and then lay across her waist. "Thanks girl; you always know what I need." She said quietly as she pet her smooth silky coat. Beauty seemed to always know when she needed comfort.

As Schuyler lay there petting Beauty and letting her eyes adjust to the dark she began to lose her battle with not thinking. _Jack_. His name entered her mind like a secret whisper opening up that particular train of thought. _I wonder what he's doing right now. I wonder if he's still here; probably not. _She thought with a sigh. _He's probably at Block 122. I doubt he sticks around here; at least maybe not until he's ready to sleep_. She thought as she closed her eyes.

She could picture his green eyes perfectly. Especially since she had just seen them, but then the image of those green eyes shifted to the ones she had seen in Venice when he had asked her to perform the blood trial. That image just served to remind her that he was bonded, and that her feelings for him were irrelevant. _He's not bonded in this life…this cycle, but it's only a matter of time._ She thought sadly as her phone rang.

She reached for it hoping that it was her grandfather. When she opened her eyes she saw that it was Oliver. _I don't want to talk to him right now_. She thought with a sigh as she put her phone back on the nightstand and ignored the ringing. She hadn't spoken to Oliver since before she left for Venice, and he was probably worried but she really didn't want to talk. She didn't want to talk to anyone unless it was her grandfather.

_Grandfather_. She thought as she tried to relax. She was having trouble and couldn't figure out why. It was as if an electric current was running through her, drawing her toward something. It was the same feeling she got when she was with Jack. She hoped that it wouldn't be a constant feeling just because they were living under the same roof. _I wonder when I'll be able to continue my training. Just because we're not living together doesn't mean that, that has to stop. I need to continue to learn; I need to be able to defend myself._ She thought just as she heard a knock on the door.

Schuyler just laid there with her eyes closed petting Beauty. She just ignored it as she did before; she didn't even glance at it. Then she heard the door open and close. _I wonder who that was. Or maybe not. It's not like anyone here wants to see me._ She thought and she felt a slight weight next to her on the bed, and she took in a sharp intake of breath as her eyes shot open only to be confronted with Jack's handsome face.

"Easy." He said quietly and she did her best to try and relax. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you, but you didn't answer when I knocked." He said. "Maybe that should have told you something." She said sarcastically. "It did; it said 'come right in I'm not busy'." He said with a smirk. "Maybe I was asleep." She said as she looked at him. "Maybe I would have woken you up." He said teasingly as he moved his face closer to hers. "I wouldn't have been happy about that." She said quietly as she began to close the space between them. It was as if they were being pulled together; they couldn't help themselves. "I would have made it up to you." He said softly and just as their lips were about to touch, her cell phone rang.

Schuyler sighed and dropped her head back down on her pillow and watched as Jack sat up straight. _What perfect timing_. She thought sarcastically as she reached for her phone. _Oliver_. She thought as she looked at her phone. She still didn't want to talk, but she reminded herself that he was probably worried and didn't want him to stay that way. _I wonder if I can make this quick._ She thought as he listened to her phone ring.

"Yeah?" She said in a reluctant, tired voice. "Hey. Are you okay? How are you doing?" Oliver asked. "I'm okay. I'm doing fine; don't worry." She said. "So…how did it go? What happened?" He asked. "Everything went well. Mimi's innocent, and Kingsley turned out to be a Silver Blood." "What?! How do you know? How can you be so sure?" He asked, shocked.

"A blood trial was performed." She said, not elaborating. "A blood trial? I thought only Gabriel had the power to do that? That is if I'm remembering my studies correctly." He said. "She _is_ my mother; turns out I have that power as well since only the uncorrupted can do it." She said quietly. "Wait a minute!" He said. "That had to have been completely dangerous for you! Your mother had centuries and centuries to learn and perfect how to do that without anything happening to her. I can't believe this! Do you have any idea what could have happened to you?!" He asked loudly.

Schuyler sighed and pulled the phone away from her to protect her sensitive eardrums. _This is why I didn't want to talk to anyone._ She thought, and felt Jack rubbing her arm in a soothing gesture.

"Yes. I know, I know. Look…can we talk later? I'm not really up for conversation right now." She said. "Umm…yeah. That's fine. How about I come over? We could hangout for a bit." He suggested. "No. I think it's too soon for that. I haven't been here long enough." She said as she looked at Jack.

"What do you mean you haven't been there long enough?" She heard him ask, and she remembered that he didn't know. _I completely forgot that he doesn't know I've been adopted._ "I've moved in with the Forces." She said. "W-what?! You're kidding me right?" He asked, and she remained quiet. "Why?" He asked after a few moments. "Charles Force adopted me." She said, and he was quiet for a long time. _So shocked he can't even speak._ She thought. "So how about we talk later?" She suggested. "Yeah okay. I'll…I'll talk to you later." He said slowly. "Bye Ollie." She said. "Bye Sky." And with that she hung up.

After that she and Jack sat in complete silence for a few minutes. Then she decided to break the silence. "So why did you come in here anyway?" She asked. _It couldn't have been to kiss me. That wasn't planned; not that it happened anyway._ "For a couple of reasons actually. First off…I'm sorry no one was here to welcome you. When we got back we went to see Dr. Pat because Mimi wasn't feeling well." He said and Schuyler looked at him sharply.

She didn't like Mimi, but she didn't want to be the reason anything was wrong with her. "It's okay. She's okay. She was just feeling a little weak. Nothing some time with her familiars can't fix, which is what she's doing right now. Anyway… my father went to handle some business the minute he knew Mimi was okay, and I'm not sure where my mother went." He said with a slight frown. "And me…well I was feeling a little weak too, so I went to see my familiar." He finished.

"You're sure Mimi's okay?" She asked, she just wanted to make sure. "Yeah she's fine." He assured her. "Okay." She said quietly, and she looked at Beauty who was breathing deeply. _She must have fallen asleep_. She thought as she slowly stopped the continuous petting she had been doing. "Well the second reason I came was to bring you your key. My father said to give it to you when I saw you. You're going to be living here, so you shouldn't have to knock on the door or wait for one of us to come home." He said as he placed it on the nightstand in front of him.

Again they were quiet for a few moments. _Why did he stop? Was that it? If so, why is he still here?_ She thought curiously. "Was there a third reason?" she asked. "Yes actually. I also came to talk." He said quietly. "I'm not in the mood to talk." She said with a sigh. "I've noticed, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't." He said softly.

"What do you want to talk about?" She asked just as softly. "Why are you laying here in the dark, and why are you trying to keep yourself from thinking?" He asked as he looked at her. He could see her face, but he couldn't quite make out her expression. "I felt like it, and it's just…I'm not ready to deal." She said with a sigh. "I'm not ready to think about my adoption, what my living here is going to be like, or the effect it's going to have on everyone. Myself included." She finished.

"I can understand that." He said. He himself hadn't even dealt with it yet. He was still shocked by what was happening, but he couldn't keep himself away from her. Not when she was living under the same roof, and walking around the same hallways as him. "Who is this?" He asked after another few moments of silence, gesturing toward the bloodhound stretched across her waist. "This is Beauty. I would introduce you, but she's asleep so it will have to wait until tomorrow." She said. "Tomorrow then." He said with a smile in his voice.

She didn't know how, but the sound of his voice seemed to sooth her into opening up. "You know…I really miss my grandfather even though it's only been a few hours." She said quietly in a sad voice. "You'll see him again. You can still visit him right?" He asked kindly. "Yes but it's not the same thing. I wanted to live with him; I traveled all the way to Venice, and literally hunted him down. That's how badly I wanted him." She said in a frustrated voice. It was like everything she had that was important to her was being taken away, and everything she wanted was being held out of her reach. Life wasn't being kind to her since she learned she was a vampire.

Jack couldn't sympathize, but he had sympathy for her. "I'm sure Lawrence is working hard to get you back. He _did_ move back here to look after you after all." He said in a sure voice. He remembered Lawrence or Metraton well, and knew that he wouldn't give up.

"You're right. Thanks for that." She said softly. "Don't worry about it." He said then paused. "Well I'm going to go now. It's getting late, so I'm gonna let you get some rest." He said and he stood up. "Okay. Goodnight, and thanks again." She said. She was glad that he was going. She had a feeling that if they continued to talk they would eventually end up teasing and flirting until they kissed. Then they would probably make out on her bed. _Yeah right. You wish_. She thought as she rolled her eyes.

"You're welcome, and good night." He said as he opened her door. He then walked out with a smile on his face. He had heard her thoughts. _She's probably right, but I'm glad I left too. As much as I would like to kiss her, her bedroom is __not__ the place, especially with the lights off. Who knows how long or how far we would let it go. _He thought as he entered his bedroom and was greeted with the happy barks of his bloodhound.

Schuyler lay there tired but not sleepy. Even if she did feel sleepy she couldn't sleep for the electric pull she was feeling. It was as if she were being drawn or called to something. _And I know that something or rather __someone__ is Jack_. She thought with a sigh_. I wonder if he's feeling this too. Yeah right, he's not feeling any of this. It's just me._ She thought with a bitter sadness.

**Next chapter is in the works. Please, please review. Reviews are nice. It makes me want to continue writing.**


	2. Making Adjustments

**Disclaimer****: I do not own Blue Bloods or the characters, and have no right to it except as a fan. I leave all the creative yummy stuff we love so much to Melissa De La Cruz.**

**Forbidden Visions**

_Chapter Two: Making Adjustments_

As soon as it became light out Schuyler carefully slide out from under Beauty, stood up, and stretched. She was restless; she hadn't slept all night not only because she wasn't sleepy, but also because of the electric pull she was feeling toward Jack. _I'll just have to learn to live with it._ She thought as she opened her closet door, walked in, and began to pick out something to wear. She grabbed a pair of dark blue jeans, a loose black t-shirt, and a large black pullover hooded sweater.

She went into her bathroom, took a quick shower, dried off, dressed, and went back into her room. She then sat on the bed and put her shoes on. Once she was done she grabbed her key, put it in her pants pocket, and looked at her phone for a moment before deciding to leave it. She then left her room, and slipped out of the house without coming across anyone.

Schuyler walked a few blocks having no idea where she was going, so she decided to let her feet carry her wherever they wanted. Next thing she knew she was walking down a path in central park. After a few minutes she spotted a bench, so she sat down and watched the birds flying around and people jogging and walking their dogs.

_I wonder what it's going to be like living with Jack. If I judge by last night then it's going to be a bit difficult_. She thought as she remembered the electric pull she felt all night, and the fact that they had almost kissed. _I can't let that happen again. We can't just go around kissing under that roof. Not with his father and Mimi hanging around_. She thought. She had no idea what his mother was like, but she didn't think it was a good idea with her around either.

_Are we just going to pick up where we left off before the attack on the repository, sort of mixing flirting and friendship?_ She thought as she remembered the small conversation they had the night before. That was the first time she had talked to him like that. She had opened herself up to him.

_Maybe we could take this chance to actually get to know each other, and maybe…just maybe spend some time together outside of school_. She thought as she sat there relaxing.

After a few hours of thinking over those things and relaxing she decided to head back, so that she could take Beauty for a walk. Once she got back she went straight to her room, grateful that she hadn't come across anyone. "Come on girl." She said after she had grabbed her cell phone from the nightstand and Beauty's leash.

Schuyler closed the door to her room while she put her phone in her pocket, and caught up to Beauty halfway down the hallway. She grabbed her by the collar and held her steady between her legs as she bent over to attach her leash. Just then one of the doors ahead of her in the hallway opened, and she looked up and out came Jack.

_Is that his room?!_ She thought in shock. _No wonder I've had that feeling all night. He's right down the hall!_ She thought incredulously as she looked back down at Beauty to make sure her leash was secured before she stood up. She saw that he was wearing black jeans, a white t-shirt with a white long sleeve button up shirt over it, and white shoes. She couldn't help _but_ notice how all the white bought out his green eyes.

Jack had to hide the smile that threatened to show on his face at her thoughts. "Good morning ladies." He said, addressing both Schuyler and Beauty, as he closed his door.

Schuyler smiled at his inclusion of Beauty. "Good morning. I guess I can give you that introduction now." She said as she shifted her eyes from him to Beauty.

"I would like that." He said with a soft smile as he looked at them.

"Beauty this is Jack." She said to Beauty as she knelt beside her and gestured toward Jack. "Jack this is Beauty." She said as she looked up to him.

Jack stepped up to them and knelt in front of Beauty and let her smell him. He laughed as Beauty started to lick his face. "Well it's nice to meet you too." He said between licks. "Okay it's my turn." He said as he stood up and went to his room, and came back out with his bloodhound.

"Schuyler, Beauty this is Patch." He said looking down at Patch. "Patch this is Schuyler and Beauty." He said to Patch.

Schuyler walked them over to Patch and she knelt down to let him smell her as well as Beauty. He sniffed them for a few moments then started to lick them. "I think he likes us Beauty." She said with a soft laugh. She then looked up at Jack. "Do you two want to walk with us?" She asked.

"Sure. We'd love to." He said and watched as Schuyler stood up. They then walked down the hallway, down the stairs, and left the house.

* * *

Schuyler was a little nervous as they walked. She had never spent any time outside of school with Jack. The repository and modeling stints didn't count, and they had certainly never been alone during those times. _I guess now is a good time to get to know him. I mean I was just thinking about spending time with him._ She thought as they continued to walk.

Jack was busy thinking along the same lines, so he wasn't paying attention to her thoughts. _I want to get to know her better_. He thought as he glanced at Schuyler. _I love her, but I don't really know much about her. That's just crazy! I need to do something about that._ He thought as they walked in silence. _I'll just have to spend more time with her, in and out of school_. He thought as he looked over at her.

"So tell me something about yourself that I don't know." He said, breaking the silence that had fallen between them.

"Umm…I like to draw, and I'm starting to listen to music more then I use to." She said. "What about you? Tell me something about yourself." She said, happy that he had initiated the questions.

"I like to spend time at the gym." He said and listened as she laughed lightly.

"Working on your muscles huh?" She said with a laugh. "That's interesting. I've never been to a gym. Anyway…I like to be anywhere that's quiet and peaceful." She said.

"Really? Why do you go to the Bank then?" He asked curiously.

"I only go because Oliver likes the place, and because it can be entertaining sometimes." She said. "And you? Do you like going to the Block?" She asked.

"I only go because Mimi asks me too. I usually slip out about half and hour after I get there, and go home or to the repository and read." He said.

Schuyler was surprised at this. She thought that he would like going to the club.

"So tell me, what do you do you like to draw?" He asked as they turned down a street.

"I like to draw all kinds of things. Mostly anime girls, saucer eyed boys, dragons, and ghosts, but it really depends on my mood sometimes." She said. "Now you know what I like to draw, so now you have to tell me what you like to do at the gym." She said with a smile.

Jack laughed at that. "Okay. I usually swim, play basket ball, and do some running on the indoor track." He said and he saw Schuyler raise an eyebrow at that. "I don't _really_ run, just jog really slow. It helps me clear my head." He clarified.

"In door track?" She asked. She was curious about it being in doors, and thought that the building must be really big.

"It's a private gym. The track is in a large room that houses the basketball courts. It circles around the top of the room." He said.

"How do you get up to it? Is there a stairway?" She asked.

"Yes there is. It's in a different hallway then the entrance to the basketball court, and you have to be shown where it is to get to it." He said.

All the talk about the gym reminded Schuyler of her training, and she began to think about what she had done so far, which wasn't much. _Here I am wondering yet again when my training will continue. I need to learn more._ She thought.

"You should talk to Lawrence and ask him." Jack said after hearing that thought.

Schuyler glared at him. "I hope you're not always in my head listening to my thoughts." She said half angrily. She couldn't be too mad at him. It was apart of who he was, and she knew that she would do the same.

"No. But to be honest I do listen sometimes." He said.

She sighed. _I wonder what he's heard so far_. She thought. She was mainly concerned about when she was thinking about him. "Are you listening now?" She asked, feeling a little paranoid.

"No I am not." He said honestly, and he thought about how that must feel, to not be able to keep ones thoughts to themselves. _Maybe I should let her hear my thoughts_. He thought and considered it for a moment. _Yeah. Yeah I think I will_. "Would it make you feel better if I let you in my head, so you can hear my thoughts?" He asked quietly, not wanting people to hear this part of their conversation.

"Yes." She said, already feeling better at the idea. She couldn't wait to take him up on that, but she would give it a few minutes before she tried.

"Okay." He said. _I should teach her to block me from her thoughts. I know she's learned to close her mind, but she's going to need to learn something stronger to keep someone like me out._ He thought with a sigh. He still couldn't believe how easy it was to hear her thoughts. It was usually easy for him to get into a persons mind, but there was always a little effort needed. With Schuyler there was none.

_She deserves to have privacy, especially from someone who loves her. Plus she's a new soul and she needs to learn it anyway. Especially with the Silver Bloods attacking, and having attacked her twice already_. He thought in concern and determination.

"I'm going to teach you how to block me from your thoughts." He said and paused for a moment. "It'll be apart of the training you're receiving from Lawrence." He finished.

Schuyler was surprised, but even so she leapt at the chance to learn something new, especially if it was to learn how to keep him out of her head. No girl should have the guy she liked, be able to know what she was thinking. "Really? That sounds great." She said.

"It will be hard, and it'll be continuous since we're living together. So we won't stop even though you take breaks from the rest of your training." He said, and then added, "I'm a very, very good seer, and once you can close your mind to me you'll be safe from all telepathy."

"I'm okay with that. I'm prepared to accept the challenges." She said. She was excited about the prospect of learning how to close her mind to him, and of the fact that they would have more time to get to know each other.

"We should go and tell Lawrence all of this. Who knows, he might be happy about it." He said.

"You're right. I'll call and see if he's home." She said as she pulled her cell phone out and pressed the speed dial button for home.

"**Van Alen residence."** She heard when the ringing stopped.

"Hattie. It's me." Schuyler said.

"**Oh Schuyler. How are you?"** She asked.

"I'm fine. Is my grandfather there?" Schuyler asked.

"**Yes he's here." **She said.

"Do you know if he'll be leaving anytime soon?" Schuyler asked.

"**Not that I know of."** She said.

"Okay. Thank you Hattie. I'll be there soon, but don't tell him okay? I want it to be a surprise." Schuyler said with a smile, and Hattie assured her that she wouldn't say a word.

Once Schuyler was done with her call Jack took out his cell and called for one of the Force drivers to pick them up from where they had stopped. They could have gotten there quicker without the ride, but they were bringing Patch and Beauty with them.

* * *

When Schuyler and Jack arrived at her house they walked up to the front door and Schuyler rang the doorbell. She saw Jack raise and eyebrow, and she focused on trying to hear his thoughts. _**Ringing the doorbell? Where's your key?**_ She rolled her eyes and laughed lightly. "I left it in my backpack; I didn't think I would be coming here today, but it's okay. They're use to it. I always forget my key and have to ring the bell." She said.

_Wow! His thoughts sound just as nice as when he's speaking out loud_. She thought and she glanced at him, and saw him smiling at her. She blushed as she realized that he had heard her and she looked away. "I forgot." She said.

"That's okay. It'll take time to get use to me listening all the time, but don't worry. I'm sure you'll hear something that'll make you smile." He finished teasingly just as the door opened.

Hattie greeted them warmly and told them that Mr. Van Alen was in his study. Schuyler told Jack to let Patch off his leash as she bent over to take Beauty's off. "Beauty will show him around." She said and then led him up stairs to her grandfather's study.

Schuyler knocked on the door when they reached his study, and opened it slightly. She saw him look up from a book he was reading and smile. She smiled back and ran into the room and straight into his arms.

Jack walked in and closed the door behind him with a smile on his face. He was glad to see how happy she was to see her grandfather. That had been another reason why he suggested they tell him now; he didn't like how sad she sounded the night before.

"How was your night?" Lawrence asked Schuyler.

"Restless." She said with a sigh as she let him go.

"Why?" He asked as he went and sat back down behind his desk.

"I don't know; I just couldn't sleep." She said with a sigh. "Anyway. So when can we get back to my training?" She asked.

"Actually I was just thinking about that. It's going to be more difficult now that you're not living here. We're going to have less time to spend on lessons." He said with a heavy frustrated sigh.

"Yes but still…we can make it work. We have to." She said with determination in her voice, and both Lawrence and Jack smiled.

"And we will. How about we start the day after school starts?" He suggested.

Schuyler nodded her head and smiled. _Jack?_ She thought as she looked toward him, and watched as he nodded and walked over to them.

"Schuyler and I were talking before we came over, and I told her that I would teach her how to close her mind from me. I was thinking it could be apart of her training." Jack said.

"Yes that is a very good idea. Once she learns from you she'll be safe. Her mind will be safe. Yes, yes I agree with this completely and I thank you." He said to Jack, and both he and Schuyler smiled.

"I'm glad that you came today. I wanted to ask a favor of you." He added, looking at Jack.

Jack was surprised, but nodded for him to continue.

"I wanted to know if you would be willing to train Schuyler in hand to hand combat?" He asked and Schuyler gaped.

_I've never fought a day in my life. I'm going to terrible at this._ She thought as she looked at her hands, letting the idea of learning how to fight sink in.

Jack looked at Schuyler as he listened to her thoughts. He looked at her for a long moment then closed his mind and thought about the idea_. I'll get to spend more time with her. More time then I originally thought I'd get. Teaching her how to fight will be interesting, and it'll give me a good excuse to touch her_. He thought. "I'll do it. So how is the schedule for this going to work?" He asked looking from Schuyler to Lawrence and back.

_Lessons closing my mind, lessons with my other vampire powers, and now lessons in fighting. I'm going to go into hibernation again_. She thought and she heard Jack say _**"What?"**_ It was so loud that her head snapped up.

She looked at her grandfather and then at Jack, and saw the look he was giving her. It was a look of disbelief mixed with concern, and she realized that he hadn't spoken out loud, that he had projected that to her. _Don't worry though. We'll just have to keep my familiar close by during certain lessons_. She thought to him, trying to get that look off his face, and watched as he nodded slightly.

They of course didn't know that Lawrence had noticed her head snap up, and the looks they were giving each other. He could tell that they were communicating through their minds, and he wondered what was being said. He knew that Jack was drawn to Schuyler, but Schuyler wasn't drawn to Jack. At least…that's what he thought. "What do you think Schuyler?" He asked.

"Umm…how about I come to you for lessons on some days, and every other day I'll train with Jack? So it'll go back and forth between the two of you." She said looking at them both.

"I'm okay with that." Jack said.

"And so am I. So it is all settled then." Lawrence said. "You won't forget to keep up with your reading will you?" He asked.

"No I won't forget." She said as the phone rang. She watched as her grandfather answered, and both she and Jack could hear that it was business so they left the room to give him some privacy. "Come on. I'll show you my room." She said once they were outside the door. She then led him down the hallway, past the stairs they had come up, and continued until she was at her room.

"Welcome to my room." She said as she opened the door and stood aside so he could walk in.

After Jack was inside she closed the door and walked over to her window while he looked around. _Fighting lessons huh? This is going to be interesting, and who knows...it could possibly be fun_. She thought to herself. _You know Jack…I never got to thank you for the roses. They were beautiful. I was so surprised when they placed them in front of me. _She thought to him as she continued to look out the window.

Jack smiled as he listened to Schuyler's thoughts while he sat on her bed across from her. _**What makes you think I sent the roses?**_ He thought to her, trying to hide his pleasure from his inner voice.

Schuyler closed her eyes and smiled as she shook her head slightly_. "For Schuyler, who doesn't like love stories."_ She quoted. _Only __you__ could have written that_. She thought to him as she leaned her back against the wall next to her window, so that she was facing her bed.

Jack smiled and in a blink of an eye he was standing right in front of her, so close that he could feel the heat radiating from her body. He then lifted his right hand and placed it on her cheek, and watched as her eyes snapped open with a quiet gasp. _**Those roses were an expression of my feelings for you, and you deserved them.**_ He thought to her while looking into her blue eyes, and listening to her heart beat faster and faster.

Schuyler was surprised to feel Jack's hand on her face, and even more so when she saw him standing in front of her. She knew she wouldn't have heard him, but she hadn't even sensed his presence in front of her.

As she listened to his words her heart began to beat faster and faster, helped along by the electric charge between them. She knew the meaning of those roses, and that had been apart of the reason why she was so surprised. He was mated with Mimi, and to know that he had those feelings for her made her sad and frustrated.

"White for light. White for love. White for forever." She mouthed to him to stop those thoughts from forming in her mind, and she watched as he nodded. _Appearing so suddenly again. How do you __do__ that? I couldn't even sense you standing there_. She thought to him in an effort to try and distract herself from his hypnotizing eyes and the electricity between them.

_**Practice**_. He thought to her. _**Don't worry. With all the training your about to go through you'll be able to do it in no time.**_ He thought as he began to lean toward her.

Schuyler's heart skipped a beat as he began to get closer to her. _What are you doing?_ She thought to him, knowing full well what he was about to do.

_**Finishing what I started last night**_. He thought to her as he continued to lean toward her.

Schuyler blushed and she thought about the two kisses they and shared so far at Bliss' party and at the Masquerade.

_**How did you find out about that anyway? **_He thought. He remembered her thinking about it before they left Venice. She had basically been telling him that she knew.

_I saw you switching masks in Mimi's memories_. She thought, and watched as he smiled and gently pressed his lips to hers.

As Jack kissed Schuyler he slowly slid his tongue across her bottom lip, asking her to let him in. When he felt her open her mouth he slanted his mouth against hers, and slipped his tongue inside her warm mouth deepening the kiss.

As he slowly swirled his tongue around hers he slid his hand from her face to rest on her neck. He _was_ a vampire after all. He loved the feel of her heartbeat under is hand, and the feel of her blood rushing through her veins under his fingertips.

Schuyler couldn't describe what she was feeling during the kiss, especially when she felt his tongue around hers.

She slid her arms under his arms, around his back, and grabbed his shoulders as she felt him deepen the kiss. She thought about how the kiss was different then the others. It wasn't like their first kiss, and it didn't feel urgent like their second. It felt romantic and passionate.

She then felt him place his other hand on the side of her neck, and she was more aware of her heartbeat then she had ever been before. It felt as if it were beating in her throat.

As they were losing themselves in the kiss they both heard a door open, and then foot steps heading in the direction of her room.

Jack deepened the kiss more, adding pressure for a moment, then pulled away.

They looked into each other's eyes, breathing heavily, for a few moments as the listened to each other's heartbeat and the footsteps getting closer. Then they both blinked and in that space of time she had moved to sit on the bed where he had been sitting, and he was leaning against the wall on the other side of the window, looking out at the view.

A moment later there was knock on the door. "Yes?" Schuyler said as she forced her breathing to return to normal while looking toward the door. She watched as her grandfather opened the door.

"I have to go to the repository for a meeting, so I'm about to leave." Lawrence said as he listened to the rapid beating of their hearts. He knew something had happened between them. It was way too quiet, but then they could have been communicating with their minds.

"Okay. We should get going too." She said. _As much as I don't want to leave, I know I have to. I have to adjust to this; I have to get use to living there_. She thought as she stood and looked to Jack.

"We should go find Patch and Beauty." Jack said as he pushed away from the wall with a smile.


	3. Conversations

**Disclaimer****: I do not own Blue Bloods or the characters, and have no right to it except as a fan. I leave all the creative yummy stuff we love so much to Melissa De La Cruz.**

**Author's Note (Please read)****:** **Just so you know my story is rated 'M' for suicidal tendencies, violence, adult themes, and stalking. I know this story is coming along slow, but I promise I will eventually get to all the yumminess that is Schuyler and Jack. Anyway…there will be some Silver Blood attacks, but I'm not good at writing those, I'll leave that genius work to Melissa, so those won't be my main focus. Honestly it's really just a Schuyler/ Jack thing going on, so try not to expect much.**

**Sorry I took so long getting this out. There were a number of useless reasons for that, but the main reason it wasn't out about a week or two ago was because of the loss of my brother. So I'm going to dedicate this chapter to his memory.**

**In loving memory of  
David Earby Jr.  
1979 - 2008**

**Forbidden Visions**

_Chapter Three: Conversations_

After they rounded up Beauty and Patch Schuyler and Jack said their goodbyes to Lawrence then got into the car, driven by one of the Forces drivers, and headed back to the penthouse. As they rode through the streets of New York they looked out the windows at the passing scenery, each lost in their own thoughts.

Jacks thoughts centered on the kiss that he and Schuyler had just shared. _Her lips are so soft, the way her arms felt around me, and the feel of her blood rushing through her veins. Just remembering it all has me aroused._ He thought with a silent sigh.

Schuyler gasped, having heard his thoughts, and looked at him with a shocked smile on her blushing face.

Jack blushed when he heard Schuyler gasp. This time he was been the one to forget that she was listening. "You weren't supposed to hear that." He said with a glance in her direction.

"Well you did say that I would hear something that would make me smile." She said teasingly, trying to lighten the mood and relieve both their embarrassment.

"You're right." Jack said, looking at her with a smirk.

After that they lapsed into silence. Schuyler focused on keeping her mind blank. She didn't want to embarrass herself like Jack had, and since he hadn't taught her how to keep him out she wasn't going to think about anything. When they got back to the penthouse they headed up the staircases to the hallway where their rooms were located then they parted with a smile, and entered their rooms with their bloodhounds at their side.

**Schuyler's POV**

Once inside her room Schuyler took Beauty off her leash then went into her bathroom and splashed her face with cold water. After her face was dry she left her bathroom, laid on her bed, and tried to relax. _This morning has been really tiring. Not that I wasn't already tired. So much has happened and it's only noon_. She thought as she looked at Beauty, who was stretched out on the floor next to her desk.

Schuyler let her eyes shift from Beauty to roam around her room, taking in what it looked like in the light of day. She then got up and headed for the window after her eyes landed on it. She opened it and took in the view of New York with a bright blue, sunny background. She then looked down and blinked at the sight of how high up she was. She wasn't afraid of heights, so it didn't bother her at all.

She then closed the window, turned to her left, and went into her closet in search of her backpack. After finding it she dug through it looking for her mp3 player, and once she had it she said a quick goodbye to Beauty and left her room. She wanted to be out of the house on such a nice day even though she hadn't decided where she was going to go. Plus she needed to think and she couldn't think about some of the things she wanted to with Jack listening.

Once outside Schuyler decided she was going to go visit her mother even though she knew she was going to be going again the next day. She then turned on her mp3 player and set out for Columbia Presbyterian Hospital. On her way she finally let herself think, starting with her decision to adjust with living with the Forces.

_Look at me. I've decided to try and adjust to living with them, but I can't keep myself at the house long enough to do that. I mean I'm definitely no fan of Charles or Mimi, but I'm sure living with them won't be bad. This morning was great with Jack. At least I'm dealing with the situation with us. I was worried about the awkwardness of living with him and what that was going to be like, but it looks like it might be okay. Especially with the lessons giving us more time to spend together._ She thought as she noticed that she was halfway to the hospital.

_The lessons, the training. I still can't believe that he's going to be teaching me to fight. What is that going to be like? How am I going to feel when that starts? I mean he's going to be teaching me how to close my mind and I'm already paranoid about that. But then that's different because he can already know what I'm thinking, where as with my fighting skills, he won't know until we start. There are just things I don't want him to know I'm thinking._ She thought with a sigh as she reached the hospital.

Schuyler greeted the security guard and the nurses as she made her way inside and up to her mother's room. She looked through the window on the door and went inside, closing the door quietly behind her. She pulled a chair up to the side of the bed and gazed at her mother as she lowered the volume to her music a little.

"Hello mother." She said softly and kissed her on the cheek.

She wondered if her mother would ever wake up. She was at a point in her life where she needed her mother's love, advice, and understanding. She knew that her mother would understand what was going on between her, Jack, and Oliver. _Maybe I should tell her what's going on. Ask her advice on what I should do. I know that she won't answer, but at least I would be getting this off my chest._ She thought.

It was true. She was alone with everything she was feeling and going through. She would usually have Oliver to talk to, but now that he was her familiar and she knew how he felt about her it was impossible. She wasn't even sure she would have wanted to tell him even if she could talk to him and know that he would probably understand. Now that she didn't have her best friend to talk to, she didn't have anyone. She supposed she could talk to Bliss since she didn't have a problem with the fact that she liked Jack and that he liked her, but she couldn't tell her about the situation with Oliver. She had to be careful about who knew that he was her familiar or they would be in some serious trouble.

"Mom I want to tell you something." She said, deciding to tell her. She needed to tell someone even though it would be painful. "I don't have anyone else to talk to. I know that you can't answer me, and…maybe that's a good thing. That I can say this without interruption." She said just as a new song started to play on her mp3 player.

_The broken clock is a comfort,  
It helps me sleep tonight  
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time  
I am here still waiting though I still have my doubts  
I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out_

_  
I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing  
With a broken heart that's still beating  
In the pain there is healing  
In your name I find meaning  
So I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on,  
I'm barely holdin' on to you_

As Schuyler listened to the song it brought sad tears to her eyes and made her remember just how much she liked Jack. She then began, in a quiet voice, to explain the situation between herself and Jack. She paused for a moment then corrected herself somewhat. She guessed that her mother wouldn't know whom she was talking about so she referred to Jack as Abbadon. She then told her mother how she felt when he first spoke to her and she learned that he knew her name, and how she felt every time she saw or spoke to him after that. She went on to explain what happened during the dance they shared at the school dance, the kiss they shared at Bliss' party, the kiss they shared at the masquerade, the many conversations they had had, the bouquet of two hundred white roses on valentines day, and the kiss they had shared that morning.

She had missed the rest of the song she had been listening to when she first started to explain, and the song that had just started also reminded her of Jack and how much she liked him.

_Chasing fireflies  
__Elusive dreams  
__This pre life crisis  
__Is killing me  
__Beautiful tragedy  
__Who I was I wasn't me  
__Yeah yeah_

_You make it easier to be  
__Easier to be me  
__It's hard to believe  
__You make it easy…_

_That describes what I'm feeling. Jack __is__ like an elusive dream_. She thought as she remembered how he would pay her so much attention one day and treat her like she didn't exist the next_. It's like he can't make up his mind, but then he has made it up hasn't he? That's what he's basically done with saying he has an obligation…responsibilities to his family_. She thought.

_We speak in silence  
__Words can't break  
__It feels like we are  
__Falling awake  
__In a place and a time  
__Of our own  
__Yeah yeah_

_You make it easier to be  
__Easier to be me  
__Hard to believe_

_It felt like the world  
__Fell from my feet_  
_Gave up on myself_

_You didn't give up on me  
Let myself go  
You were still there  
__Like coming home  
__Coming up for air  
__Yeah yeah_

_You make it easier to be  
Easier to be me_  
_It's hard to believe  
You make it easy_

After the song ended Schuyler turned her mp3 player off and let her tears flow freely. She then began to tell her mother about the little things, like the electric pull she felt toward Jack, how she loved the sound of his voice, and how she could get lost in his eyes. She paused at that point and slouched in her seat feeling sad and depressed.

"Well that's everything. Now you know the situation between us, and how much I like him. It doesn't matter how much I like him though does it, because he's as good as bonded to Mimi or Azrael as you might call her. He loves her." She finished in a choked whisper as she started to cry harder. "Why mom? Why did I have to fall for him? Why is he treating me like this? Leading me on like he doesn't have Mimi…umm I mean Azrael. And why am I letting him do it?" She asked in agony.

Of course there was no answer from her mother, and she already knew the answer to the last question. She just couldn't voice it to herself, so she put all thoughts of Jack away or at least she tried to and began to tell her mother about the situation with Oliver. How she needed a familiar, but wasn't ready to take one and put it off so long that she didn't have a choice. How she didn't want to do it with someone she didn't know, and how Oliver was her best friend so she used him.

Schuyler told her mom how she had doubts about it and for good reason. She explained what happened when she sank her fangs into his neck and drank his life source; how his mind was completely open to her and how she learned that he was in love with her. She paused again for the second time in her long recital and began to cry harder for the terrible mistake she made in making him her familiar.

"I don't know what to do mom. What I've done is only going to make his feelings stronger, and I just don't feel the same way about him." She choked out as she leaned forward and put her head on her mother's bed next to her hand. She then took hold of her mother's hand and just cried, finally letting out some of the pain she had been keeping bottled up.

It was late afternoon, early evening when Schuyler pulled her hood over her head and left her mother's bedside and continued out the hospital. She couldn't believe how her wonderful, happy morning with Jack had turned into a dreary afternoon of heartache. She was about a block away from the hospital when her cell phone started to ring. She pulled it out and saw that it was Oliver. She groaned, not wanting to answer, especially with how she was feeling, but she did anyway.

"Yeah?" She said after she had cleared her throat and answered. She hoped she sounded like herself.

"Hey Sky. You wanna come over? I was thinking we could talk, hangout. You know, give you a break from the Forces." He said.

Schuyler suppressed a groan. She had been planning on going back to the Forces to try to figure out some way to help herself feel better. _Do I really want to go see him and put myself through that with what I just went through telling mom about the situation with us? Maybe he can make me feel better. I mean he __is__ my best friend, and he doesn't need to know why I'm not in the best of moods. _She thought quickly as she walked to the subway.

"Well I haven't been living with them long enough to need a break. Remember I only moved in yesterday." She said, stalling a little while she made up her mind.

"Yeah but you should still come over anyway." He said, and she hoped that the eagerness in his voice was just because he hadn't seen his best friend in a week.

"Yeah okay. I'll be there in a little bit." She said.

"Okay. I'll see you soon then. Bye." He said.

"Bye." She said and pressed the button on her cell to end the call, and headed down the stairs to the subway.

Luckily when she got down there the train she wanted came at that moment. Once she was on it she found herself a seat and turned her mp3 player on. She had set it so that all the songs would shuffle and play randomly, so she had no idea what song would start playing and the song that started immediately brought the tears back to her eyes.

_I just don't understand  
Why you running from a good man baby  
Why you wanna turn your back on love  
Why you've already given up  
See I know you've been hurt before  
But I swear I'll give you so much more  
I swear I'll never let you down  
Cause I swear it's you that I adore  
And I can't help myself babe  
Cause I think about you constantly  
And my heart gets no rest over you_

_Well those last four lines are true_. She thought as the tears started to run down her face.

_You can call me selfish  
But all I want is your love  
And you can call me hopeless baby  
Cause I'm hopelessly in love  
You can call me unperfect  
But who's perfect?  
Tell me what do I gotta go  
To prove that I'm the only one for you_  
_So what's wrong with being selfish?_

_In love? I'm not in love with Jack_. She thought. _Oh yeah? Then why were you crying so hard and feeling so wretched when you were talking to your mom?_ Countered the voice in the back of her mind.

_I'll be taking up your time  
Til the day I make you realize  
That for you there can be no one else  
I've just gotta have you for myself  
Baby I would take good care of you  
No matter what it is your going through  
I'll be there for you when you're in need  
Baby believe in me  
Cause if love is a crime  
Then punish me  
I would die for you  
Cause I don't want to live without you  
Oh what can I do?_

_I would die for you, cause I don't want to live without you, what can I do?_ She repeated as her tears came harder and faster.

_You can call me selfish  
__But all I want is your love  
__And you can call me hopeless baby  
__Cause I'm hopelessly in love  
__You can call me unperfect  
__But who's perfect?  
__Tell me what do I gotta do  
__To prove that I'm the only one for you_

_Why do you keep us apart?  
Why won't you give up your heart?  
You know that we're meant to be together  
And why do you push me away?  
All that I want is to give you love_  
_Forever and ever and ever_

_He does keep pushing me away. He'll let me in a little then he'll suddenly push me away as if he's just realized something. He's probably realizing that he's forgotten that he's supposed to be with Mimi_. She thought with sad bitterness.

_You can call me selfish  
But all I want is your love  
You can call me hopeless (hopeless)  
Because I'm hopelessly in love  
You can call me unperfect  
But who's perfect?  
Tell me what do I gotta do baby  
To prove that I'm the only one for you, oh!_

_Selfishly I'm in love with you  
Cause I've searched my soul  
And I know that it's you  
Selfishly I'm in love with you  
Cause I've searched my soul  
And I know that it's you  
Selfishly I'm in love with you  
Cause I've searched my soul  
And I know that it's you_

_I do feel like some part of me woke up and became alive when I started feeling this way about him._ She thought as her tears continued to come hard. She was glad that she had her hood up covering her face from view, although that didn't stop people from hearing her. She was making no attempt to keep quiet.

_To prove that I'm the only one for you  
So what's wrong with being selfish, selfish, selfish…  
So what's wrong with being selfish…_

When the song ended Schuyler was crying so hard and so lost in thought that she almost missed her stop. She was able to hurry off before the doors closed though, and make her way to the subway exit. As she walked up the stairs leading to the street she struggled to contain her tears, but it wasn't working with the thoughts in her head.

_Why? Why do I have to feel this way about him? He's with Mimi. His powerful immortal mate! It's not fair! Why do I have to like someone I can't have?_ She cried in her mind.

It just wasn't fair. She couldn't believe that she had fallen for a guy she couldn't have. She wondered briefly if she would ever get over him or if she was just destined to spend all her years pining over him.

_Destined to spend all my years_. She thought slowly, letting it sink in.

Then a horrible realization came to her. She wasn't just a half-breed; she was the odd vampire out. Literally. There were four hundred vampires. An even number, which meant that every one of them had an immortal mate whether they were bonded or not. She made four hundred and one, so what did that mean for her?

_Am I destined to be alone forever?_ She asked herself. That thought surpassed her tears and sent her into a deep depression. _Alone forever_. She thought, and it was like an echo in her mind repeating itself over and over until it faded into nothing.

As Schuyler neared Oliver's house the thought settled in her mind and her already deep depression deepened. She really hoped that this visit with Oliver would cheer her up at least a little.

It didn't.

When she got to his house she could tell that he knew something was wrong. She couldn't blame him for the shocked concerned look that he had given her. Her eyes were all red and puffy; not an easy feat for a vampire. She decided that he didn't need to know the exact reason for her current mood, so she told him that she had just come from visiting her mother and that it had been a particularly difficult visit.

"Why?" He said, wondering why this visit had left her this way.

"It doesn't matter." She said with a note of finality in her voice that ended the subject.

"Okay." He said slowly. "Well are you hungry? Do you want anything to eat or drink? You look like you could use a drink." He added.

Schuyler turned away to hide the grimace that crossed her face. The tone of his voice made it impossible not to know what _kind_ of drink he was referring to. She wasn't disgusted by it. No. What disgusted her was the eagerness in his voice, which brought up the thoughts she had earlier about making him her familiar.

"No I'm not hungry or thirsty thank you." She said as she sat on a comfy black leather beanbag chair on the floor. She wanted to play it safe and not sit anywhere where he could sit next to her and try and _snuggle_ up.

"Are you sure?" He asked as he sat on his bed with a slightly disappointed look on his face.

"Yes I'm sure." She said. She was a little thirsty in the vampire sense, but she was feeling too depressed to do anything about it. And since she was feeling bad about making him her familiar she was even less inclined to satiate her thirst.

After that they spent some time talking about trivial things like what people wore in Venice and what people (blue bloods) would say when school started back, and then Oliver wanted to know what it was like living with the Forces. Schuyler had to fight back a sad sigh as the mention of the Force name brought Jack to mind, and her realization of being alone forever.

"There isn't much I can say. I haven't come across Mimi, Trinity, or Charles. The only Forces I have seen are Jack and his bloodhound." She said, and she noticed that Oliver seemed to stiffen at the mention of Jack's name, so she bit her lip and held back what she was going to say about him training her to fight. _I'll just tell him another time. I wouldn't tell him at all, but I know that sooner or later…more like sooner I'm going to need to feed because of it_. She thought as he flipped through channels.

They spent the rest of the time watching re runs of America's Next Top Model. They commented on the outfits each girl wore, criticized their makeup, and made fun of each photo shoot. It wasn't cheering her up, but it was keeping her mind from wandering and thinking. She glanced at the window and noticed that it would be getting dark soon, so she stood, stretched, and turned to Oliver.

"It will be dark soon; I should be getting back before then." She said.

"What? Did they give you a curfew already?" He asked with a frown as he walked her to the front door.

"No." She said, throwing him a glare. "It's just that Silver Bloods seem to like to attack me at night, so I'd like to get off the streets before it gets dark." She said as they stopped in front of the front door.

"Okay. I can get my driver to give you a ride." He offered.

"No thanks. I want to enjoy what's left of the day light." She said with a slight smile as she opened the door.

"Okay. I'll talk to you later then." He said and she saw that he was leaning in to kiss her on the lips. She was uncomfortable with that and didn't want it, so she turned her head slightly to the side so he got her on the cheek.

"Okay. Bye." She said as she turned away from him and began to walk away with a goodbye wave of her hand. She didn't turn around because she didn't want to see the expression on his face that her slight movement had caused.

As Schuyler made her way back to the subway she though about how Oliver felt about her. _I don't understand how he fell in love with me. I'm just me, but then I don't know why I like Jack so much_. She thought as she headed down the subway stairs. She still couldn't admit to herself that she was in love with Jack. She was very troubled about the situation between herself and Oliver, and worried about what would happen to their friendship. _Not that it hasn't already changed_. She thought as she waited for the train she needed to take her to the area where the Force penthouse was.

On her way back to the penthouse she listened to music, which did nothing to help relieve her depression. All the songs that played either reminded her of Jack or of how she was the odd vampire destined to be alone. Once she got to the penthouse she went in and headed up to her room. She thought she caught a glimpse of her uncle, but she wasn't sure and didn't care. She was focused on keeping her mind blank. She knew that Jack was home because the moment she walked in the door she felt the electric pull she always felt when he was around. She didn't want him to know what she had been thinking about, so she kept her mind blank. It wasn't too hard since her depression seemed to keep her thoughts away.

She went into her room, closed the door, and greeted Beauty sadly. She then went and pulled her sketchbook out of her backpack then proceeded to turn her mp3 player off. She put it on her nightstand next to her cell phone charger, and plugged her phone into the charger. She then took her shoes off, turned on the light, and made herself comfortable on her bed as she prepared to sketch something that described what she was feeling.

**Jack's POV**

Once inside his room Jack took Patch off his leash, then sat on his bed and began to take his shoes off. As he did that he heard his door open and looked up hoping that it was Schuyler, but was disappointed when he saw that it was Mimi.

"Where have you been?" She demanded after closing the door.

_Should have known it wasn't Schuyler. Schuyler has the decency and enough respect for me to knock before entering_. "Well you seem to be feeling better." He said as he finished removing his shoes. "I went with Schuyler to walk Patch and her dog, then we went to talk to Lawrence." He said honestly. _It's true. She doesn't need to know the details of what happened though._

"Is the half-breed missing home already? She's only been here overnight, and she's already running to grandpa." She said with a smirk.

Jack suppressed a frustrated sigh. _Mimi can be rude and inconsiderate sometimes. You'd think that Schuyler hadn't saved her life the way she talks about her_. "She needed to talk to him about her training." He said in a tight voice, irritated by her, but wanting to defend Schuyler.

Mimi looked like she was about to say or ask something, but her phone rang and she quickly answered it. He tuned the conversation out, not caring who was calling and what was being said. Once she was off the phone she said that she was going out with her friends, 'followers' he liked to call me, and then left.

He sighed and grabbed his CD player from his nightstand, made sure there was a CD in it, and laid back on his bed and began to relax. He pressed play and after hearing the first words of the song that started he remembered that it was a mixed CD. Just when he decided to think about what had happened so far that morning he heard Schuyler leaving and wondered where she was going.

_Well at least this gives me a chance to think without worrying about her hearing. I know I could close my mind to her, but I don't want to. She doesn't have that luxury yet and I won't use it until she does. At least I'll try not to._ He thought as he remembered how he said he would teach her to close her mind to him. _It won't be hard to teach her. It's really a mind over matter deal. She'll have to do a lot of concentrating and maybe some visualizing but she'll be able to do it. I think I'm going to teach her this before we start our fight training. I already have an idea of using our thoughts as part of the training. That should be interesting._ He thought.

_I still can't believe I agreed to teach her. I mean I want to teach her all this because she really needs to know how to defend herself, and it gives me a very good excuse to spend time with her away from everyone. But what about Mimi? She's not going to be pleased about this. How am I going to explain this to her? Do I even need to explain it to her? Who says I have to?_ He thought with a defiant sigh.

"Come here boy." He called softly as he pat his bed next to him. He watched as Patch jumped on his bed and stretched out next to him. Then he began to rub and scratch his head, letting the feel of his soft fur relax him.

Jack then began to think about Mimi and his feelings for her, and how they had changed. He still loved her, but ever since he started having feelings for Schuyler it was as if his love for Mimi had been put on pause. What he felt for Schuyler was something new to him entirely. It surpassed anything he had ever felt for Azrael or even Gabriel. It made him feel happy, alive, and complete. What made him happier was that she returned his feelings. He could feel it in the electric charge that sparked between and drew them together, and he could feel it when they kissed.

_Every time I kiss Schuyler it's amazing, and I never want it to stop. Like the kiss from this morning_. He thought with a sigh. _I could just imagine how long that kiss would have lasted if Lawrence hadn't interrupted. It felt so good. I can't wait to kiss her again_.

As Jack thought this he was reminded about how he was never satisfied with his lot in life, and how he never got what he wanted.

_I always did what I was obligated to do knowing that that was what I owed my family, and that it was what they expected of me throughout the years…the many cycles. I always settled for what others wanted instead of what I wanted_. He thought, his mind immediately conjured up an image of Schuyler as if to tell him he had an obligation to himself what he wanted. With her image in his mind a song started playing that made him think of his relationship with her or at least of what they had so far. He wasn't sure if he could call it a relationship.

_Wrap my arms  
__Around your name  
__Feel your breath  
__Against my pain  
__As I breathe out the past is gone_

_Empty smile  
__Naked heart  
__Who I was  
__Falls apart  
__When you're here inside of me_

_Feel till you're numb  
__Depth perception becoming  
__The new deaf and dumb_

_I'm losing myself just to find a place in your mind  
__In your mind  
__Changing myself just to stand alone in your eyes  
__Your eyes…  
__Pull me in  
__Take me out  
__Make me over_

"Who I was, falls apart, when you're here inside of me." He repeated softly. _That's kind of what I felt today when I let Schuyler in my head. I wonder if I'll always feel that way when she's in my mind._

_Read the wave  
__Ride your fears  
__In this ocean of years  
__We've been here, swimming on_

_Take me deep  
__Till I find  
__Every corner of your mind  
__We've been here, swimming on_

_Touch till you taste  
__All the time we are wasting  
__Alone, waiting here_

_I do want to find every corner of her mind. I like being in her mind._ He thought softly as his eyes closed.

_I'm losing myself just to find a place in your mind  
__In your mind  
__Changing myself just to stand alone in your eyes  
__In your eyes…  
__Pull me in  
__Take me out  
__Make me over and shout me out loud  
__Shout me out loud_

_I'm losing myself just to find a place in your mind  
__In your mind  
__Changing myself just to stand alone in your eyes  
__In your eyes…_

_I'm losing myself just to find a place in your mind  
__In your mind  
__Pull me in  
__Take me out  
__Make me over_

Jack started the song from the beginning and let it lull him to sleep. His last thoughts were on Schuyler as he wondered if he would choose to follow his feelings, his heart or if he would follow his responsibilities to his family.

**.:xXx:.Hours later.:xXx:.**

Jacks eyes shot open as he was forced out of his sleep by the electric pull he felt toward Schuyler. As he sat up and blinked his eyes in his dark room he realized that he had fallen asleep with his CD player still playing, and a song he had never associated with anyone, until that moment, began to play.

_So many times I thought I held it in my hands  
__But just like grains of sand,  
__Love slipped through my fingers...  
__So many nights,  
__I asked the Lord above please make me lucky enough to find a love that lingers,  
__Something keeps telling me that you could be my answered prayer,  
__You must be heaven sent I swear_

_Schuyler_. The lyrics immediately brought her to mind.

_Cause something happens when you look at me I forget to speak  
__Something happens when you kiss my mouth my knees get so weak  
__Could it be true this is what God has meant for me  
__Cause baby I can't believe  
__That something like you could happen to me  
__(Something likes you)_

Jack smiled at those lyrics. This song described exactly what he felt for Schuyler. As he listened to the song he could feel her getting closer to his room, and he looked toward his door as if he could see through it and glimpse her.

_Girl in your eyes, I feel your fire burn (feel your fire burn),  
__all your secrets I will learn even if it takes forever...  
__with you by my side I can do anything,  
__I don't care what tomorrow brings, as long as we're together  
__my heart is telling me that you could be my meant to be  
__I know it more each time we touch_

He heard her walking down the hallway and he entered her mind only to find it full of Avril Lavigne music and empty of all thoughts but he wasn't surprised at that. What surprised him was what he sensed coming from her. It surprised him because he was only able to sense things coming from Mimi, and what he was picking up from Schuyler was stronger then he sense he had ever gotten from Mimi. He wasn't sure what it was that he was sensing but he didn't like it. He knew that something was wrong with her. _I'll give her some time to get settled before I go to her._ He thought.

_Cause something happens when you look at me I forget to speak  
__something happens when you kiss my mouth my knees get so weak  
__could it be true this is what God has meant for me  
__cause baby I can't believe  
__that something like you could happen to me_

_something magical (something magical),  
__something spiritual (something spiritual),  
__something stronger than the two of us alone, yeah  
__something physical,  
__something undeniable  
__nothing like anything (anything) that I've ever known_

_This is the perfect song for us…or at least to express how __**I**__ feel about her. I'll have to share this with her, but not tonight_. He thought.

_Cause something happens when you look at me I forget to speak  
__something happens when you kiss my mouth my knees get so weak  
__could it be true this is what God has meant for me cause baby I can't believe, no  
__that something like you could happen to me  
__(something like you)_

_that something like you could happen to me...  
__something happened..yeah...ooooohh...mmmmm  
__can't believe that you happened to me yeah yeah_

When the song ended Jack turned his CD player off and headed for his door. "Come on Patch." He called to his bloodhound. Then they made their way to Schuyler's room and he focused on her mind.

* * *

_**Can I come in?**_ He thought when he felt her in his mind.

Schuyler looked up at the door when she heard Jack's inner voice in her mind, then looked back at her sketch paper. _Yeah_. She thought as she started to draw.

Jack opened the door and walked in with Patch. He left the door ajar so no one would think they were doing anything. What could they do with the door open? He rolled his eyes and shook his head before the thought could register in his mind for Schuyler to hear. He knew with their speed they could do anything they wanted without being caught, but it would be very uncomfortable to anything that fast and to know that someone could come and see. Not to mention hear.

"Can I sit on your bed?" He asked. He hadn't asked the last time he was in there, but he didn't want to make her anymore upset then she already was.

Schuyler nodded her head as she continued to draw and watched slightly as he stretched across the end of her bed, and Patch went and laid next to Beauty under the window.

Jack looked at Schuyler and saw puffy red eyes on a blank emotionless face. He frowned as he wondered what was up with her and why she had been crying so much that her eyes looked like that_. She seemed fine before she left_. He thought.

_You're starring at me. Why?_ Schuyler thought without looking up from her sketch. She had no idea what she was drawing. She had decided to just let her hand take control and pour her emotions into it. So far she had drawn a long deserted road in the middle of the page.

Jack blinked and was stuck for a moment. _**I'm sorry. It's just I know something is bothering you, and I'm trying to figure out what it is**_. He thought to her, not taking his eyes from her.

Schuyler sighed, keeping her blank expression firmly in place and her mind just as blank. _Please don't worry about it Jack. It's nothing important_. She thought and withdrew from his mind.

Jack sighed and laid down on his back and starred at the ceiling. He knew that it _was_ important, but he didn't want to push the issue and force her to talk about what was bothering her. She never did that to him. _But then I don't think she's ever been around when something was bothering me. Unless I count when the whole Silver Blood attacks started. Speaking of the Silver Bloods…I guess now would be a good time to start teaching her to close her mind. It would distract her from whatever it is that's bothering her, and who knows, I might be able to make her smile_. He thought and began to focus on her mind.

As Schuyler drew a person standing at the beginning of the road with their back facing the viewer she felt Jack in her mind, so she focused on his.

_**I want to start your lessons now**_. He thought to her.

Schuyler's hand froze in the middle of drawing the person's hair, and she finally looked to Jack and found him looking at her. She was immediately caught in his eyes and unable to look away. _Really? _She thought and he smiled. _Okay. I'm up for that_. She thought to him. She may have been caught in his eyes, but she was able to keep her face blank.

_**Okay I want you to put up the regular protection and then strengthen it by…**_ He paused, wondering what to say. _**walls I guess. That's what most people imagine when they try to protect their minds. I also want you to think of something or picture something for me to focus on finding so we know if it's working or not**_. He finished.

Schuyler nodded then forced her eyes to close so she could concentrate on the task instead of his piercing green eyes. She put the regular protection up then imagined steel walls around her mind and pictured the bench she sat on in central park that morning. There were a number of things she could have thought of or pictured, but she didn't want to make herself feel worse by picturing or thinking of something that would remind her of the moments she shared with Jack. She was already having issues keeping herself together with him in the room with her.

"I'm ready." She said as she opened her eyes and continued her sketch.

Jack took a deep breath then closed his eyes so he could concentrate on what he was doing instead of her face. He focused on her mind and easily got past the regular protection then he encountered the walls. _Well. I thought these would be made of brick but this is even better._ He thought as he began to make his way past the walls. "An iron bench surrounded in green grass." He said and watched as she looked up at him.

"The walls didn't work?" She asked.

"They did a little. I was surprised that they were steel instead of brick. That _did_ make it a little difficult to get past. Just make the walls stronger." He said.

"Will I always have to use the walls?" She asked.

"No. Once you succeed in keeping me out then it'll become a natural defense as if it were always there. You won't even have to put any effort into it. It'll be like a reflex." He said confidently.

"Okay. I understand. Can we try again?" She asked and watched as he nodded.

They kept at it for over an hour. Each time Schuyler attempted to keep Jack out she was more successful and creative. She impressed him one time when she made the steel walls invisible as well as stronger and added heat that literally made him flinch back. This time Schuyler had the walls up leaving them invisible since she liked that, and she added a sort of fog to try and confuse him while she created more walls behind the invisible ones to help protect the image she was keeping from him which was a large heart.

Schuyler smiled tiredly at her sketch as she felt Jack trying to get past her defenses. She had gotten halfway through her sketch of the road and the person before she felt her mood change, so she decided to start a new sketch. So far she had drawn a bench surrounded in green grass with thick trees in the background and a path that spiraled into the distance in front of the bench.

_I'm determined not to let him in. This is his last try tonight and I want to make sure he fails._ She thought as she began to draw a person standing at a slight distance in front of the bench but off the spiraling path. She knew that she would have to go see Oliver tomorrow since she was now feeling weak and more then a little thirsty. _If I sleep tonight some of my energy should come back, but still…I need to feed._ She thought as Charles Force walked into her room. _Okay I know the door wasn't closed, but he could have knocked_. She thought.

Neither she nor Jack moved to greet him or said anything. Jack was focused on getting past her defenses, and Schuyler wanted to continue her sketch.

"I see you've settled in well. I'm glad." Charles said after a long moment of pause. Schuyler assumed he was wondering what Jack was doing, but she wasn't sure. She had paused in her drawing to focus completely on her defenses since she could feel Jack getting closer. "Well I wanted to inform you that you are no longer allowed to see Lawrence. The red blood courts have decided that if you are to have a chance of settling properly here then you can't keep being reminded of your old home." He finished.

Schuyler gasped and looked at Charles with complete horror and pain on her face.

Jack watched as Schuyler's mental defenses literally crumbled and revealed what she had been picturing for him to see. He watched as the large red heart cracked in two right down the middle and crumbled.

* * *

**AN # 2 (Please read)****:** **I just know like the rest of you BB readers that they had a week off. All I did was an estimated guess of how long it would take for them to get to Venice, be over there for the whole Blood Trial, and whatever else they did, then get back and I came up with 3-4 days (not counting the weekend at the beginning of the week), so I went with 4 days and had the first chapter starting with them getting back on Friday. Also, the music I used is not necessarily what the characters would listen to in the BB series. It's actually what I listen to; I just used songs that expressed the feelings and characters at the point in the story and maybe the mood of the time.**

**.:xXx:.Songs in order they appear in.:xXx:.**

**Broken: Lifehouse  
****Easier To Be: Lifehouse  
****Selfish: 'NSYNC  
****Make Me Over: Lifehouse  
****Something like You: 'NSYNC**

**Oh! I cut this chapter short cause I was tired of typing and because I wanted the rest to go into the next chapter. I just thought that the part I cut off would fit best in the next chapter, especially with the chapter title. So I have a few pages already written and I just have to outline the rest of the chapter. Hopefully because of that I'll have the next chapter out sooner.**

* * *


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